A Hot Meal and a Cup of Tea

  When I DM and when I play I am often surprised by the simple little things: player treat horses like bicycles; they never ask about the weather, and they treat fire as nothing but a light source.

  I already talked about the weather a bit and I plan to write about horses, so let's talk about fire.

  We'll start by talking about encumbrance.
  No matter where you fall on the matter of encumbrance (and I am a hard-ass stickler that will slow you down, give you penalties, and expects you to track every 1/10th of a pound) on a long journey it will be very hard to bring enough food and essentially impossible to bring enough water since the minimum a person needs is 10 lbs of water a day. So we must assume that adventurers are getting water from somewhere (streams, springs, and wells above ground. And you have water sources in your dungeons, right?) and that these sources aren't always (maybe never) pure water.
  Have I mentioned my disease and parasite rules?
  In Real Life over 3 million people die each year from water-borne diseases. Even crystal-clear water from an alpine creek can cause lethal diarrhea. Now, there are a few ways of avoiding this ranging from adding 1 part red wine to 3 parts water (which does an amazing job purifying drinking water, thus why the ancients did it) to drinking only beer to Purify Food and Drink to being a paladin.
  But one of the most direct and best is - boiling the water, which also kills parasites.
  There are other impacts, too. A series of studies in America and the UK show that office workers are more mentally alert and observant if they have a hot beverage (tea or coffee) in the morning. World military forces have been aware of the positive impacts on morale of plentiful hot beverages, as well, and I have very rarely seen a canteen, chow hall, etc. that didn't have hot tea or coffee available 24 hours a day.

  Another thing to think about is, well, the temperature. In the modern world where we go from heated home to heated car to heated office it is easy to forget that it gets cold. Imagine being dressed in chain mail on horseback in a biting wind and cold drizzle for 8 hours on a late Autumn day. Or sleeping in the open on the ground in early Spring. The Wilderness Survival Guide had some great ideas about dealing with cold weather (or hot weather, for that matter) but I often just do something simple - at a certain point travelling in the cold without adequate shelter and heat is force marching. Eventually just being out in the elements is force marching, too, even if you aren't moving.
  Dungeons are pretty chilly, I suspect. Remember, it tends to be cool underground and is often damp. According to my friends who are into caving and online caving guides one of the biggest dangers of caving, if not the biggest, is hypothermia. I assume that this is probably a problem in any deep underground place, even a worked dungeon. So PCs are going to need to warm up and/or dry off routinely.

  Last is food. I have certainly lost track of the parties that blithely announce that they will supplement their rations by 'hunting along the way' when in the wilderness. If they are very far from civilization they will also state they are having a 'cold camp' without a fire. I then ask them how they are preparing the food they hunted....
  I did mention my disease and parasite rules, right?

  Rick's disease and parasite rules are included in his supplement Far Realms, available in print and as a PDF. Far Realms also includes new hirelings, such as the healer, new PC classes, like the barbarian, and more than 30 pages of new spells. Suitable for any old-school campaign, please consider buying Far Realms today!

  Anyway, while cooking your food does greatly reduce your chances of dying horribly from disease or parasite hot meals are important to alertness and morale, too. British and American forces in combat reveal that eliminating a hot breakfast has twice the negative impact on soldier morale than doubling the amount of time they are in active combat zones. That's right, soldiers are twice as upset over no bacon and toast than they are about getting shot at more often! Just giving soldiers the ability to heat field rations has a notable positive effect on morale and performance.

  So all this long rambling is to support my actual point.

  Characters in fantasy RPGs should worry about being able to start and maintain a fire.

  So why aren't coal and charcoal seen more often on equipment lists and in character inventories?

  Yes, I am starting another 'stop thinking like a modern person and think like a medieval person' rant, why do you ask?

  People have been making charcoal for thousands of years, so far back we aren't sure when it started. But since charcoal is critical to metalwork, I have always assumed it is readily available in virtually any fantasy campaign.
  Now, actual charcoal looks very little like those briquettes for your grill. Lump charcoal looks like what it is - chunks of charred wood. from finger to fist size. Lump charcoal can range from low quality stuff that has a strong smell and a fair amount of smoke when it burns to expensive types that have virtually no odor and very little smoke when burning.
  In any case, lighting charcoal is relatively simple - flint & steel with a good tinderbox should do it as log as the charcoal is dry. Lump charcoal gets to temperature quickly and burns hotter than briquettes and the more expensive types leave less ash behind. A handful of lump charcoal will burn long enough to bring a gallon of water to a boil and maintain a boil for a full minute; a double handful is enough for 2 gallons and a meal for four-5 people.

  Coal can be more expensive or hard to find than charcoal and its quality varies from lignite to anthracite. Bituminous, which is the type usually used by smiths, is fairly easy to light (easier than charcoal), doesn't burn as hot as charcoal, and makes more smoke and ash than good charcoal. But it will light and burn when wet (although it smokes more) and the same volume of coal burns longer than charcoal. Anthracite burns with much less smoke and ash than bituminous and burns a long time but can be difficult to light. A lrge lump of bituminous coal can boil 2 gallons of water and a double handful can boil 4 plus cook a meal for 4-5 people.

  I should also mention peat - a sort of 'pre-coal' from bogs and mires, when properly dried peat can burn for a long time and produce a nice amount of heat. It has a distinctive smell and a fair amount of smoke, though.

  In each of these cases, charcoal, coal, and even peat, you get more heat for the same space/weight than wood. Also, since most wood needs to cure and dry for a while to make a good fire (and it might be wet, besides) these are great ideas outdoors as well as underground.

  Field cooking equipment is very old. Romans had all sorts of things to make army cooking in the field better and by Medieval times field cooking gear was fairly well developed with small portable iron fireboxes (about the size of a helmet), fire stands, griddles, field cauldrons (again, about like a helmet), and such. Wooden and earthenware mugs we also pretty common back then.
  The small iron fireboxes typically had a lid and such so that the airflow (and thus temperature) of the fire could be controlled. This lets them double as a heater for tents and small areas and for a small amount of fuel to last a long time. In my opinion, each party should have at least one iron fire box, a field cauldron, a small griddle, a fire stand, and some charcoal or coal.

  Which brings us to another point; air. No matter how little smoke is made, fires consume oxygen. Even in AD&D you should make sure there is enough fresh air to safely make a fire.

  No, this post is not a description of camping gear and a safety statement.
  Well, not just those things, at least.

  I concern myself with these details for a number of reasons.
  First, I want verisimilitude in my campaign - I track water usage, encumbrance, weather, etc. because it makes the world I built more internally consistent, which makes the rest of my job easier.
  Second, in my experience it allows the players a better chance to immerse themselves into their characters and the world and gives many opportunities for roleplaying - little bits like who is good at building a fire and who can't cook are fun and add a ton of depth, all on the cheap.
  Third, it is another way to weigh down characters while vacuuming money out of their belt pouches.

  Fourth, it has implications that can be plot hooks.
  For example, where does the coal come from? In Real Life the easily accessible coal was gathered very early. Are there coal mines? Where? You need coal and charcoal to make things like, oh, iron, so - do the dwarves mine it/make it? If they don't they have to get it from somewhere!
  Charcoal can have a huge impact on a region. Interesting fact - no forest in Finland is more than 300 years old. Why?
  They cut down all the trees for charcoal over the course of about 250 years!
  Mainly to get wood tar, but it was the charcoal process and it really, really changed Finland for a century+. In my Seaward campaign colliers slip into the forests between civilized lands and the orcish city-states to make charcoal to sell. Very, very risky, but very profitable. The gnomes of Gladdenstone make a lot of money mining anthracite and selling it to the dwarves. The barbarians of Eiru have to collect peat from the edges of the haunted Moorlands to heat their homes in the harsh winters of their island nation.

  So think about it. Maybe have a henchman demand more pay or have a hireling quit suddenly because there is never a pot of tea at dawn, or have the party suffer a -1 to hit from fatigue after 3 days of near-hypothermia in a dungeon's depths. Gnomes increasing prices for coal might push the dwarves to the brink of war and orcish raids in Autumn could lead to suffering as the poor run out of charcoal to heat their homes in deep Winter.

  Or just imagine going 3 days with no tea, coffee, or hot food yourself and build an adventure from that. Mine would have lots of murder and naps.

Magic Item of the Week - Amulet of Perception

  Another magic item from my 11 year old.
  Usually a small piece of jewelry with an eye or lantern motif this item grants its wearer an 18 Intelligence only for purposes of detecting an invisible creature. If the wearer has an 18 intelligence the Amulet grants a +5% to existing chances of detecting invisible creatures.

Why Encumbrance Matters To Me

  This past week I did a routine audit of character sheets and found that most of the players were ignoring encumbrance, so I directed them to clean up their sheets, get their encumbrance correct, or else I would just assign encumbrance levels until they did.
  My oldest son, a stalwart and a hard worker, lamented how difficult it is and how much time and attention it takes.
  Likewise, this very morning I read an RPG blogger talking about how they really, really dislike encumbrance rules.

  I was a tactical soldier in an airborne unit based in Ft. Bragg for 6 years. I I have done hundreds of miles in ruck marches and was in land navigation competitions [think orienteering in rugged terrain with 80-100 lbs of equipment]. I became so adept at fitting necessary gear into tight space my kids say I have the Clever packer skill at 93%.

  I know encumbrance.

  I also know that it matters. Carrying too much weight slows you down. Carrying big, bulky objects slows you down. Travelling becomes much harder when you are carrying a heavy load. Horses are not motorcycles - too much weight slows them down and can hurt them, etc.

  At the same time, there are serious reasons that soldier carry so much weight - you need things! Food, water, bandages, blankets, light sources, arrows, sling bullets, tools, components, rope - all could be very important. I am far from the first guy to point out that a core element of games, both modern and old school D&D in particular, is resource management. If you just handwave components then magic-users and clerics get easier and more powerful; if you handwave food and water you reduce or eliminate time limits of travel and exploration; if you handwave equipment you reduce or eliminate the use of all sorts of barriers, tricks, and delays.
  Ignoring things like, oh, how many torches you need also makes a lot of spells useless. If the cleric never needs to consider a Light, or Create Food and Water, or the wizard never needs to think of Floating Disc or Tiny Hut why do those spells exist? What are they for? And this is yet another way you make your spell casters more powerful in combat - the cleric can take all healing and combat spells, the mage can take all combat spells because, well, they don't eat, sleep, or get cold and can always see.
  If you do make them account for everything you can add a lot of tension to the game very simply.
  Example: Krellor was worried; somehow the map was wrong. He knew it was wrong for one simple reason - they couldn't get out. He had originally been angry with Mellie, the young cleric. he was really glad he hadn't said anything, though; after 2 days of following the left wall they not only hadn't found the way out they had taken at least 3 different routes. Somewhere in the maze of rooms and corridors was a trick wall, door, or corridor that kept moving on them.
  Kurrie, the scout, had lost his grin and was looking downright scared. Alazaar, the mage, was starting to slow down and even the shaven-headed monk Xing was obviously suffering. They had been without food for 3 days, now, and the brackish water from the puddle was almost gone, too. If they didn't find the way out soon they might die of thirst in these twisting halls. Krellor had relented this 'morning' and they group was alternting left and right in hopes of avoiding whatever deviltry was trapping them here.
  Perhaps as troubling as the lack of food and paucity of water, they were down to just 3 inches of candle in Mellie's lantern - the feeble light barely allowed them to creep through the halls. Once it went out they would be almost totally blind - and as good as dead.
  Kellor habitually checked his weapons belt as he prepared to round a corner. As he paused he heard a noise from the corridor; with a gesture Mellie closed the shutter on the lantern. The lost adventurers waited as a glow appeared from around the corner and the sound of orc voices grew.
  When the orcs rounded the corner Kurrie, Xing, and Krellor fell on them ferociously and with total surprise. The slaughter was over in moments and Kurrie began rifling through their gear.
  Three flasks of oil was good. An entire smoked ham and a sack of dried cherries was better. The full waterskins on all 6 of the dead orcs was best. Kurrie habitually grabbed the few coins these low-level guard had on them as the party carefully ate and drank a little. Too much at once would make them sick. After 20 minutes of rest interspersed with a few small bites and spare sips Mellie refilled and lit her lantern before tucking the candle stub away.
  Maybe their luck had changed. Maybe they would get out. At least they had another day or two to try.
  That was from an actual adventure I ran that the players still talk about much later.

  Keeping track of this stuff, while time consuming, can be both a source of game tension AND a tool for character development.
  Example: As beautiful as the sight of the first rays of the sun sparkling off the snow-capped mountains was, Aurelius missed the abbey. The warm bed, the food, the wine. But most of all, the library. All that knowledge, all that wisdom. He liked nothing more than to immerse himself in the rows of books until he was too exhausted to read another page.
  But as a prefect he had certain responsibilities. The bishop had asked him to join the paladin Tamarind and his companions in a quest to end the attacks on the western villages. Aurelius had smiled, agreed, and inwardly bemoaned whatever streak of madness had compelled him to travel with Tamarind when both of them were newly ordained. Aurelius' reputation as an 'adventurer' may have earned him a swift promotion or three, but it also kept him from his beloved books.
  There was Tamarind, now, riding alongside the trail, checking on all of his companions. A good man, Tamarind, truthful, brave, and honorable. He saw Tamarind pull up next to Aurelius' acolyte, Willit.
  "How fare you, young Willit?"
  "Very good, Sir Tamarind."
  "Excited?"
  "Oh, yes, sir! When we return I am to be tonsured as an adept!"
  "Keep it up, and soon I shall be reporting to you!"
  "Oh, no Sir Tamarind! A knight like yourself reporting to someone like me?"
  "A knight, but yet a paladin who must answer to the priests, isn't that right Father Timms?"
  Aurelius' other assistant, riding nearby, chuckled and said,
  "Mayhaps I have the authority, but the temerity? That I do not have!"
  At Noon Aurelius' two assistants supervised his servants as they set up a field table for Aurelius, Tamarind, and the companions to eat their meal. Others set up a blanket on the grass nearby for the servants' meal. The companions were all good company: Orion, the famous wizard from the West; the dwarven warrior called only the Smiter; the lovely halfling maiden and scout Mellificent; Fandor, the ranger from the Great Wood; Tamarind; and Aurelius. After their quick meal of cold meats, cheese, and small beer the servants quickly loaded the gear back onto Aurelius' cart, mounted their own mules, and they resumed.
  At evening the servants erected Aurelius' pavilion and prepared a meal. As the companions dined the servants gathered wood, built another fire, erected Aurelius' sleeping tent, and prepared their own shelters and meal.
  An hour before dawn Aurelius said the travelling Mass with Father Timms and Brother Willit assisting. Afterwards the servants quickly struck camp and prepared everything for the road.

  Tamarind and Aurelius are both characters from campaigns I have played in. Tamarind is a typical paladin; water and thin gruel for breakfast, lunch is a meal in the saddle, dinner might be a sapare hot soup and some hardtack. He has a prudent amount of gear but otherwise the Lord will provide.
  Aurelius has 2 henchmen, a valet, 5 teamsters, 2 porters, a linkboy, a cook, 3 grooms, and 7 light cavalrymen as hirelings. His people all travel on horse or mules or in the cart he brings along in addition to his pack horse. He carries tents, a pavilion, field tables and chairs, silverware and place settings, tools, rope, spare clothes, manacles (in various sizes) blank books, vials, jars, and boxes for samples, etc., etc., etc. All in addition to a mix of fresh and preserved food, water, wine, and brandy.
  His henchmen and hirelings typically build and guard a camp for the extra equipment with the servants making things ready for the party's return. On at least one adventure one of the henchmen led 2 guards and a teamster back to town with a wagon to completely replenish supplies while the adventurers were still underground.

  Sure, these are extreme examples, but show that if you want to use encumbrance it can be a lot more than just book keeping on a character sheet.

Magic Item of the Week - The Blessed Staff

  From my eleven year old.

  This large oaken staff is topped with a 3" bronze orb and has a +1 bonus to hit (only). While the staff is held by any creature of Good alignment it can be willed to shed the equivalent of a Light spell.
  When wielded by a cleric of Good alignment and at least a 13 Wisdom its full powers are unlocked, as shown in this list;
  -When used as a weapon vs undead the staff inflicts +5 damage as well as all the effects of a full vial of
        holy water
  -The wielder has a +2 on all saving throws
  -The wielder is immune to disease as a paladin
  -Bless (twice an hour)
  -Prayer (once a day)
  -Cure Serious Wounds (once a day)
  -Cause Fear (once a day): the power can only be used against evil extra-planar creatures, but such
      creatures do not receive magic resistance to avoid this effect.

New Magic Item - the Glory Stone

  Another item from my 11 year old son!
  Only 4 or 5 glory stones are known to exist and they are both prized and avoided. They are all large (3" to 4"), unbreakable amethysts of various purple shade.
  Every glory stone sheds light as a Continual Light spell at all times. If dispelled, countered, etc. this light returns to full intensity in no more than 5 rounds - only a Rod of Cancellation or Disjunction spell has a chance of permanently dimming a glory stone.
  The light of a glory stone dispels illusions as a 9th level illusionist within 60' (but the light must shine on the illusion). The wearer/bearer of a glory stone receives +4 on all saving throws against charm effects as does his allies within 60'. If exposed to a charm effect that normally does not allow a saving throw (from a nereid or ultrodaemon, for example) the wearer and his allies get a base save of 18. Lastly, anyone encountering the wearer/bearer of a glory stone has their reaction adjust by +15%.
  All of these powers require the glory stone to be openly carried or worn and its light to be shining forth.
  Each glory stone has an intelligence of 14, a Chaotic Neutral alignment, and the personality of a curious, hyper-active child. The 'stone can see and hear everything within 60' when it is openly worn or carried and can speak Common, Elvish, Dwarvish, Gnome, Halfling, Orcish, Goblin, Kobold, Ogrish, and all dragon tongues (it cannot read). When covered so that it emits no light it is also effectively blind and deaf and its voice is reduced to a faint, muffled noise.
  The 'stones do not like being put away for long periods of time and may become resentful if they are not routinely held or worn. They can be loud, pushy, obnoxious, curious, and helpful, all at once. They may demand that books, notes, carvings, etc. be read to them, that their wearer read them a book or tell them a story, or their wearer pause to admire some flowers, etc. While the 'stones' senses and voice might very well be helpful (for example, place one on the end of a staff, stick it around a corner, and have the stone report on what it sees), protective (warning of a goblin sneaking up behind the party), or informative ('the goblin says that his tribe is coming') it can also be a hindrance; refusing to translate for some imagined, slight; continuous chatter while the party is attempting to sneak through a dungeon, and even worse ("Is this the terrible king you are planning to overthrow? Your majesty, my friends say you are a bad man and I hope they beat you up!").
  If the owner works hard he can, over time, build a rapport with a 'stone so that he might convince it to be silent for a time, or to not interrupt or tell secrets, but this is always a chancy thing.
  Because of its intelligence and senses a glory stone can be affected by a Mirror of Life Trapping or similar spells and devices.

Magic Item of the Week - Figurine of Wondrous Power - the Golden Llama

  Yes, I am a big fan of Figurines of Wondrous Power. And why not? They are nicely odd, wonderfully non-scientific, and useful.

  This figurine was found in an ancient step pyramid in the deadly jungles of the Fever Lands. It appears to be a small llama figure of gold about 2 inches by 2 inches. When the command word is spoken the figurine transforms into a full-size llama with golden-yellow fur. Its stats are;
  HD: 3  H.P. 24
  A.C. 7 Move: 120'

  The llama has no melee attack but the owner may command it to spit once every other round with a range of 60'. This spit is targeted as a creature of 5 HD, has no range modifier, and any creature struck must save vs. wand at -2 or be blinded for 1 full round.

  The full sized llama comes equipped with a woven harness and wicker baskets that may hold up to 600 lbs of weight. The llama maintains its full movement rate when carrying 300 lbs or less and is at half movement rate when carrying between 301 and 600 lbs. If more than 600 lbs is placed on the llama it immediately reverts to figurine form and cannot be activated again for 5 days.
  The llama is extremely sure-footed and has no trouble navigating stairs, ledges, narrow bridges, steep, rocky slopes, etc. If carrying 300 lbs or less the llama is easily as agile as a mountain goat. The llama is also a strong swimmer and has no fear of monsters, fire, smoke, spell effects, etc.
  The llama will never enter an extra-dimensional space while activated.
  The llama may never be used as a steed for a living, conscious creature. Unconscious creatures, dead bodies, caged birds, even pets may be carried, but a conscious, living creature capable will simply be unable to mount the llama. This includes bound prisoners.
  The figurine can be activated for up to 16 hours at a time for no more than 80 hours per months (from new moon until new moon). Or, more simply, either 5 full days of 'dungeon crawling' and it is deactivated while the party sleeps or 10 full days of cross-country travel and it is deactivated while camped. If 'killed' by damage it reverts to figurine form and cannot be activated for 72 hours.

  Items carried by the llama do not transform with it  they are left on the ground around it when it reverts to figurine form unless it is unloaded ahead of time

Magic Item: The Woundrous Fruit Basket

  Created by my fourth son, who is 11 years old. He calls it 'cleric in a basket'!
  This a large wicker basket, much like an American picnic basket, about 16 inches long, 8 inches wide, and 8 inches deep with a large handle and flip up lids. It always weighs one pound. The basket makes all saves as wood.
  When a basket is first discovered it contains the following fruit:
1d4 kiwi
4d4 bunches of grapes
1d6 cantaloupes
1d6 apples
1d8 grapefruit
1d4 bananas
2d2 mangos
  These each have wide variety of magical effects that occur when eaten:
Each kiwi removes 1d4 years of age.
Each bunch of grapes heal 2d4 hit points.
Each Cantaloupe counts as an entire day of food and water.
Each apple acts as a Neutralize Poison spell.
Each grapefruit acts as a Cure Disease spell.
Each banana acts as a Remove Curse spell.
Each mango counts as Cure Blindness/Deafness spell.

  All fruit fits easily into the basket and the desired fruit is always on top if any is left; the fruit is always fresh and delicious. Eating a 'dose' of fruit takes one round. Nothing else may be placed into the basket.
  When all the fruit is eaten, The basket vanishes only to appear in a random location in the world full of the above fruit.

Magic Item of the Week: The Minion's Sword

   I like henchmen in my campaigns.
  The Minion's Sword (also called the Lieutenant's Sword or the Companion Blade) is typically either a longsword or broadsword but can be any type of sword, including scimitar or falchion. It is made of high-quality steel, has an excellent balance, and feels comfortable in the hand. The blade has decorative etchings along the center, a hilt wrapped in silver wire, and its crossguard/hilt is either chased in silver or gilt. The hilt further has a number of small precious stones (garnets, topaz, or similar) and the pommels has a larger stone (amber, amethyst, etc.) but none of the stones are ever 'top quality' like diamond or ruby.
  When unsheathed and held the sword sheds light in a 20' radius. It is immune to rust and makes all saves at +2. The sword has no bonuses to hit or to damage but can strike any creature (i.e., the sword can inflict damage on, say, werewolves or iron golems as if it had the required to hit bonus). The reason for its name is its magical effect upon the weilder. If wielded by a henchman or hireling the wielder has a +5% loyalty and +10% morale bonus while wearing or carrying the sword. If the Minion's Blade was given to the henchman or hireling by his employer as payment or reward those bonuses increase to a total of +15% loyalty and morale bonus and anytime the wielder is compelled to harm his employer (from the effects of a Charm Person or similar effect) the wielder gets an immediate save at +2 to end the compulsion.

Magic Item of the Week: The Portable Cottage

  As I have admitted before, I love non-combat magic items. I also love 'variant' items where you take a classic item and change it a bit to make it fit your campaign better.
  This is a magic items I came up with after reading the Secure Shelter spell many years ago; it is a variant of the Instant Fortress, of course.
  Magic Item - the Portable Cottage: Unactivated, this item appears to be a wooden cube 1" on a side with the rune for 'house' on one face. When placed on the ground and the command word uttered it transforms into a well-made cottage. The Cottage is 20' by 15' on the interior with a large door in the middle of one long wall and a smaller door at the edge of one of the short walls. The interior ceilings are 8' high. The walls and floor are of dressed planks. There is a fireplace and hearth opposite the main door. The long walls each have 2 windows with heavy shutters and the short walls each have one similar window.
  The Cottage is furnished with 2 bunk beds and a larger bed, a table and 6 chairs, a padded chair, a footstool, a large chest, and a side table. There is also a large bin for firewood and a water barrel. The bin can hold 1 days worth of wood for the fire and the barrel up to 50 gallons of water. When activated the large chest contains clean linens for the beds - anything else placed in the chest will be dumped on the ground when the Cottage is deactivated. Likewise, water may be stored in the barrel and wood in the bin - anything else is dumped on the ground when the Cottage resumes its cube shape.
  Any living creature inside the Cottage when it is returned to its cube form must save vs. Wands - if the save fails they are stunned for 1d4+1 rounds and take 2d4 damage; if successful they are stunned for one round and take 1d4 point of damage.
  If attacked treat the cottage as being identical to a large round tower for its resistance to spells or siege engines. If damaged the Cottage recovers one structural point per month is remains in cube form.

The Weekly Useful Magic Item - plus: Encumbrance and Water!

  My first ever! Well, first ever on purpose; I put the Robe of Deeppockets up last week.
  I have always had a special fondness for magic items like Daern's Instant Fortress or the Bag og Holding; useful but not combat-oriented. So I will try to add a new useful item each week!

  Magic item; Everfull Flask.This is a small metal pint flask designed to be slipped into a pocket [i.e., a hip flask] with a cork and metal stopper attached to the bottle with a chain. It is typically found full of resh water. At any time the flask is not full and the stopper is in place after 5 minutes the flask will refill itself with fresh, clean water that is pleasantly cool. Without the stopper in place the flask will not refill itself.
  Other things may placed into the flask (oil, potions, etc.) but the flask will not refill itself until after the other liquid is removed. The flask makes all saving throws as hard metal.

  The Everfull Flask is meant to be a 'nice to have' magic item about utility rather than effect. It only produces a pint of water at a time, the gap between pints is at least 5 minutes, and it only refills with the cap on - you can't use it to put out large fires or flood a room. So why have one? Well, with one of these you never need worry about dying of thirst.
  Your players aren't worried about their characters running out of water? Maybe you should fix that.   See, water is heavy 1 pint = 1 lbs in game. And you need at least a gallon of water every day just for drinking. If your players are sending their characters into a dungeon they need at least 2 full wine skins each for 8 hours of walking and fighting [for historical reasons I set a wine skin's volume at a quart] through a dungeon. That's 4 lbs. of water. Oh, they get stuck or lost and are there overnight? Then they start taking penalties for thirst and dehydration.
  Or they can take the 'Flask!

If I Had a Permanent Robe of Deeppockets

    Ah, Dragon Magazine #67; quite a famous issue, really.  I had had my subscription renewed for my 15th birthday just a few months before and I wore that issue out with re-reading. Its has so much! The write ups for St. Cuthbert and Iuz; how to adventure on the Astral; the Grugach and the cooshie; and, of course, Fedifensor!
  All of those are worthy of articles. And if you don't know what Fedifensor is, I am so sorry.
  But today I am going to write about what was one page 2 - new spells! Particularly the spell Deeppockets, which I saw as too fun not to use. The very next session the party got a permanent Robe of Deeppockets, an item that is still on my treasure tables.
  Magic Item: Robe of Deeppockets-The robe is of fine make and cut and will magically resize itself over the course of a week to provide a good fit (they come in two sizes - small for gnomes, halflings, and dwarves, and tall for humans, etc.). There are 10 hand-sized pockets within the robe. Each pocket is a separate extra-dimensional space that can hold up to 1/2 a cubit foot of volume and up to 10 lbs of weight. Rules on sharp objects, overloading, etc., are as for a bag of holding.
  Yesterday my 10 year old son, N., emailed me a list entitled "If I had a permanent robe of deeppockets". This prompted me to come up with an even longer list of things it is handy to have along when you have extra-dimensional storage on hand. N.'s items are the first dozen on the list; his notes (are in parentheses) mine are [in brackets]:
1. A Murlynd's spoon and a wooden bowl
2. An Everfull Flask [another unique magic item I will detail later; you can replace it with a Decanter of Endless Water]
3. A nice spot for my familiar
4. tongs
5. empty vials with lids
6. some torches
7. empty wooden box 18 "x 8" x 6" [note: that's .495 cu. ft., making me very proud]
8. Quills, ink, and parchment
9. Scrolls
10. an object with Continual Light
11. a Reduced mummy in a glass jar [I pointed out it would be too bug, so he's looking for a better monster]
12. a ruby ring (for bribes)
[now my stuff]
13. 100 g.p.
14. leather gloves
15. travelling spell books
16. a ceramic vial of Green Slime
17. marbles
18. a jar of pepper and spices [to throw off scent tracking]
19. a towel
20. hacksaw with extra blades
21. chalk [in various colors]
22. a jar of grease [everything from coating squeaky hinges to smearing at the top of a long flight of stairs]
23. tool hammer and chisel
24. a jar of iron filings [good for ghasts and rust monsters]
  So, what small items do you think are useful, imperative, fun, or funny to have along?

The Patented Rick Stump Continual Light Rod

  The name I used for a piece of equipment that was, effectively, standard for all my PCs.
  Work with the description, there was never a picture.
  a wooden rod 6" long and 1" in diameter, has Continual Light cast upon it then a wooden strip is glued to one side with a tab sticking up 1". This is slid into a 6 1/2" long leather case with a slot along one side and a cap attached by cords. The slot has has 6 thongs and eye hooks along its length and there is a loop from the base of the case.
  How it works: The attached wooden strip goes under the slot in the case so, with the cap on, the rod is completely covered, shedding no light. Remove the cap and the light rod is almost like a flash light, shining light out of the end to a very short distance. By sliding the rod further out and securing it by using the thongs and eye hooks plus the tab you can control the amount of light emitted like opening the shutter of a hooded lantern. The loop at the end can be put around a wrist or belt of even through a purpose-made hole in a shield or staff.