New Spell: Mordenkainen's Mediocre Motel Room

From the Lads-
Mordenkainen's Mediocre Motel Room (Summoning, Alteration)
Level: 2                                                      Components: V, S, M
Range: 0                                                     Casting Time: 1 round
Duration: 1 hour/level (see description)    Saving Throw: None
Area of Effect: 7'x7'x7' cube

Explanation/Description: When cast the magic-user summons a Mediocre Motel Room, a wooden shelter that is roughly 7' wide, 7' deep, and has a very slightly pitched roof that reaches 7' at its highest. The Motel Room is of average-to-poor construction (the roof and each wall have only 2 Defensive Points each when resisting siege damage) and is usually painted in a distinctive, even garish, manner (such as teal walls and an orange roof, or pale beige walls and a bright, cherry red roof).
  The Motel Room has a single door (1 defensive point) that has a simple lock (+15% on lock picking attempts) and an interior bolt. Next to the door is the front window, a 2' x 2' opening with shutters (1 defensive point when shuttered and barred). The window is not glazed and has no screen or curtain, allowing free passage when unshuttered.
  The interior has a worn wooden floor throughout. There is a simple bed (rope suspension, straw-filled, lumpy mattress, no linens), a very small table with an oil lamp by the bed, a small closet (2' wide, 2' deep, no door) a small room for a chamber pot (2' wide, 2' deep, no door, no chamber pot, has a small grill for ventilation, 3 inches by 3 inches, near the ceiling) and a built in desk between the closet and privy with a wooden stool by it.
  The Motel Room provides the same protection from the weather as a poorly-made, small, wooden building. It is drafty and in heavy rain the roof leaks in a place or two. There is no fireplace or hearth, but a brazier or field stove could potentially be placed on the floor. The Motel room is as subject to fire, lightning, earthquakes, etc. as any other poorly-made, small, wooden building.
  The bed is sufficient for 1 human, although it can just barely fit 2 humans in a pinch. There is enough floor space for another human and a gnome or halfling could potentially curl up under the desk. If someone is sleeping on the floor you cannot enter or exit the bed without stepping on them unless you fly or levitate.
  There is a vague, pervasive odor to the Motel Room that cannot be identified or removed. This odor makes animals uneasy so that only familiars or highly trained creatures (such as war dogs) will sleep within.
  The oil lamp burns dim and smokes a lot. While it sheds enough light to navigate the room it is too dim for reading. By command the caster can cause a light to shine from the ceiling over the bed (another command turns it off). This ceiling light is bright enough for reading, but it flickers off and on briefly at irregular intervals; studying spell books to memorize spells takes 30% longer than normal if reading by this light.
  When anyone is within the Motel Room roll encounters as normal with the exception that if two or more creatures are encountered at once there is a 50% chance that they begin to fiercely argue within earshot of the Motel Room. If this occurs the creatures will scream at each other, pound weapons on shields, roar, etc., making as much noise as possible for 2d4 turns, after which they depart for the closest tavern. Such a fight will automatically wake anyone sleeping in the Motel Room and prevent them from returning to sleep until the argument is over.
  When the spell ends the Motel Room and its furnishing vanish, unceremoniously dumping anyone and anything within on the ground.
  Despite the listed duration of the spell, no matter how much time has passed since it was cast every Motel Room vanishes at 10 am local, on the dot.
  The material component is a small key with an attached horn disk inscribed with runes and a number (costs 5 s.p.), a tiny bell (costs 1 g.p.), and 1 gold piece. To cast the spell the caster rings the bell, stands still while tapping his foot and whistling for 1 round, then tosses the gold piece in the air, where it vanishes. The key and tag vanish when the spell ends. The bell can be reused.

A Movie Game I Play With My Kids

I love movies. I studied film in college and teach film classes. I watch movies all the time, talk about them all the time, and so on.
About 5 years ago I started playing a game with my kids called 'as this movie is to you...' where I would look at a relatively recent film and compare it to a film from my own lifetime, or vice versa.
Unclear? here is a broad example.

1939 is called Hollywood's Golden Year, widely considered the year when the best crop of movies to be released in a single year was issued. Son of Frankenstein, Ninotchka, At The Circus, The Man They Could Not Hang, Destry Rides Again, The Women, Gunga Din, Tarzan Finds a Son, Goodbye Mr. Chips, Only Angels Have Wings, and You Can't Cheat an Honest Man were the c-list movies that year! Dark Victory, Love Affair, Mr. Smith Goes to Washington, Of Mice and Men, Wuthering Heights, Stagecoach, and Gone With The Wind were some of the movies nominated for Best Picture in 1939.
So here is how the first half of the game is played. I am 49 years old so 1939 was 28 years before I was born. What were the biggest movies made 28 years before you were born if you were-

39?- All the King's Men, 12 O'Clock High, and A Letter to Three Wives
29?- Anatomy of a Murder, The Diary of Anne Frank, and Ben Hur
19?- Hello Dolly!, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, and Midnight Cowboy

Here is how you do the second half of the game.
I remember seeing Big Trouble in Little China in the theater the week it came out and really loving the experience (what can I say - I'm a cult movie kinda' guy). I have seen the film a ton since it was released the year I turned 19. So - what cult/fringe movie came out the year you turned 19 if your current age is-

39?- Fargo, The Cable Guy
29?- Beerfest, Lady in the Water
24? (it takes a few years to ID a cult hit)- Hobo with a Shotgun, I Am Number 4

We play this game for fun, but there is a fair amount of information about trends in film if you pay attention.

Capsule Reviews by Genre

  Inspired by a talk with the sons last night:

Review
1) We meet the protagonists, and they are Good
2) The antagonists are bad and do bad things to the protagonists
3) Training montage
4) The protagonists gain vengeance
Genre: Kung-fu

Review
1) We meet the protagonist and he is Good, if Flawed
2) The antagonists are bad
3) Escalating action encounters
4) The protagonist wins in a final showdown
Genre: Action

Review
1) We meet the protagonist, and he is Bad
2) The secondary characters are also bad, the antagonist is Worse, and everyone does bad things
3) Betrayals happen
4) The protagonist kills the antagonist
Genre: Film Noir

Review
1) We meet the protagonists, and they are Good
2) We meet the antagonist, and he is Not Good
3) Musical Numbers and gunplay
4) The protagonists prevail, and sing
Genre: Singing Cowboy

Review
1) We meet the protagonist, and she is Nice
2) We meet the antagonist and he is Handsome
3) 50 minutes of miscommunication
4) The protagonist and antagonist kiss
Genre: Chick Flick

Review
1) We meet the protagonist and he is Smart
2) We meet the antagonist and it is Dangerous
3) Science!
4) The protagonist prevails
Genre: Sci-Fi Peril

Review
1) We meet the protagonists, and they are Wholesome
2) We meet the antagonist and he is Greedy
3) Let's put on a show!
4) The protagonists prevail
Genre: Andy Hardy/Shirley Temple, etc.

More to come!

Magic Item of the Week: Alarc's Sword

  Found in the catacombs beneath the Castle of Nightmares by the half-orc warrior-priest Alarc, this sword is of unknown origin. Bards have no record of t prior to his discovery and divinations reveal only that it is very, very old.
  After Alarc's death the sword was stolen by persons unknown and has been sighted from time to time in the years since.

Jeffro Reacts to Oriental Adventures and I React to Jeffro. Welcome to the Internet.

 Jeffro, he of the Hugo Nominations, has been looking at the old Oriental Adventures book for 1e and has written a second blog entry about it. I am going to talk about me and then about Jeffro's article.

  As some of you may know, my oldest 4 sons (ages 13 to 19) and my wife are my primary group. About 6 months ago, just before Christmas, #4 pulled down my original copy, first printing, very worn Oriental Adventures so he could memorize that, too. Next day he was sharing the book with his brothers and they were all admiring how fun, weird, and compelling it is.
  Christmas is a busy time for us, so we were doing a ton of other things until the end of the Christmas season in February. Second weekend in February? They all made characters for OA, and the wife did, too:

Wife- Shukenja
#1- Wu-jen
#2- Yakuza
#3- Bushi
#4- Kensai (as a spirit folk of bamboo the only non-human)

  I spent a few sessions doing a Seven Samurai - they protected a remote village from bandits in return for food and shelter and ended up leveling (as designed) and getting used to the new rules. They then moved to the town of the local daimyo looking for better positions, learned of a plot by a ninja clan to trigger a war between the local daimyo and his closest neighbor. Using a variety of stratagems they got received minor positions at the local castle or got 'close enough', eliminated the low-level ninja, and stopped a surprise assault on the outer gate, giving defenders times to react and proving the real threat was a third party. The players had to use guile, contacts, and deceit as much as spells or combat to succeed.
  They loved the non-standard monsters (I created 4 more from Japanese mythology), the different yet same cultural cues, and the unusual class abilities. I explicitly had everything set in my Seaward campaign (I have been using OA in my 1e campaign since the book came out) so they hope to have future crossovers.

  #1 in particular liked the wu-jen, although he found the differences in how they use their "chance to know" very different than standard AD&D spell acquisition for mages. He also liked the 'six hours to learn all spells, regardless of level or number' fun and different - he roleplayed out his character meditating, chanting, burning incense, and bargaining with unseen spirits to get back spells. His 'spellbook' was just the required chants to ask the right spirits for the correct spells.

  #2 loved teh mix of sneak, fight, and know people of the Yakuza and his ability to use contacts to answer questions was a key element of the main adventure.
  #3 played his bushi with gusto, emphasizing his lower-class origins and his outlook on his profession as a way to get paid while drinking, fighting, and impressing farm girls.
  #4was a little down at first; all through the village saving he rolled lousy and rarely hit anything. but at the key fights in the castle he was  Can't Miss Man, cutting down tough foes by himself more than once

  A key figure, though, was my wife. While she is Irish/Polish by ancestry one of her dual majors was Japanese and she went on to study Chinese and Chinese Literature. Since we were in my Japanland, she was in her element. She enjoyed the book and the 'Asian, yet generic' information in the main rules. She most appreciated giving the entire 'inscrutable Oriental' stereotype a total miss.

So, now that our very recent trip to Asialand is covered, let me address a few points that Jeffro brings up in his second post, linked above.
  Jeffro asks,

  "...shouldn’t oriental style magic be a bit more exotic?"

  More exotic than spending hours studying abstract symbols so that you have 5 dimensional constructs stored in your mind, eager to be released, such that when you do release them you summon or create energies from beyond the walls of reality?More exotic than that?
  More importantly, while I understand he is vexed by the fact that the description of how much time it takes a wu-jen to relearn spells is a touch ambiguous he seems to miss a simple fact - either reading is radically different from standard memorization procedures. OA states specifically that spells come from spirits, rather than from mentors or libraries. Sure, if you encounter a scroll you can learn from it, but the implication is these scrolls come from spirits, first- or second-hand. And with the rigid times, rather than the fluid level-based times of the DMG, it smacks of exactly how my son played it - you don't memorize spells, they are slapped into your mind by spirits as part of a ritual where your 'scrolls' are a lot more like a sutra to be chanted, like this;

  So you meditate for a few hours, then burn incense and perform small rituals to summon the spirits, then appease them with offerings (and by confirming that you have, indeed, obeyed all the odd taboos that wu-jen must follow!), then then you fisnish with 2 hours of chanting the sutras from your "spellbook" and at the end, breathe deeply of the smoke from the last of the incense. If you obeyed your taboos and performed your chanting properly you also inhale your spells.

  Rather different than reading a book for 15 minutes per level of the spell for each spell, right?
  As a matter of fact, this would make the reading 'six hours per spell' pretty hardcore. You have to summon and appease a different spirit for each spell! Every spell in your memory is much more precious because of the time needed to recover it....

  "Wait a minute," you say, "I didn't read any of that in the OA!"
  Sure you did. I mean, it wasn't forbidden, was it? And even if it was....
  The classes and mechanics of classes in OA are pretty different and the spells, elemental bonuses, ki powers, taboos, and how spells are memorized by wu-jen are pretty different than standard!

 The Jeffro writes,

  "The bottom line here is that to get a game off the ground, I either have to do the design work involved in creating these sorts of tables myself. OR I have to use the tables from the Dungeon Masters Guide and then manually retheme the results to something feels a little more “eastern”... … the former is simply not going to happen. (With the number of functional, completed game designs on the market, why would I ever do that?! Bah!)..."

Which functional, completed game designs? It was 1985. It was this, Bushido (Which I played a lot and enjoyed, but made AD&D look like a stripped-down version of S&W) or Land of the Rising Sun which was based on Chivalry & Sorcery but much more complex and difficult to play and one reviewer stated 'just play Bushido, it is easier to learn'.
  So....
  And as for 'making all sorts of tables myself'.... Yeah. It was '85. That's what you did.
  Look, when the MMII came out with its lists of monsters by occurance my friend Sean uttered a prayer in French because he usually did that by hand so he could make custom encounter lists. My Seaward stuff includes a set of manila folders which hold my custom encounter tables for each region of the campaign area. Almost everyone I knew did that.

  That is just for the Lower Briars and calls a bunch of sub-tables, too. The first draft for this thing is on the basement closet, longhan, in fading Bic ballpoint from lunchtime in 5th grade.

  Of, since Jeffro is really looking at OA for the first time now, almost 1/3rd of a century later, when there are tons of pre-made things all over the place, sure! Get it from somewhere else! But then?

  And this leads me to the end of his post. He writes,

  "Y’all got handed a half baked book that looked good on the shelf and that’s it. It was not in the interests of the company that sold it to you to ACTUALLY SOLVE THE GAME DESIGN PROBLEMS THEY WERE PUSHING ONTO YOUR DUNGEON MASTER. That poor sod either had to be so good that he didn’t need the supplement in the first place or else he had to shell out cash for modules that would only complete the design process on an adventure-by-adventure basis."

  Sorry, Jeffro. I like you, and I like your writing, but this is simply wrong.
  "Not having pre-made encounter charts" is not a 'game design problem'. More importantly, you, yourself, name this book for what it is -a supplement. In 1985 you might have to go to a university library to get access to things like 'monsters of Japanese folklore' or 'legends of China'. Having a list of monsters and classes was a huge help to guys that didn't have access to that sort of resource. A bunch of new, unusual classes, rules for making custom martial arts, tons of new spells - that was all pure gold.

  One of the most interesting things Jeffro wrote is this,
  "[the DM] either had to be so good that he didn’t need the supplement in the first place..."
  One of the things I noticed in the first minute of picking up the D&D 3e PHB was a change in assumption about the players and DM, and I miss it. The biggest, most profound, change was the loss of the presumptions of competence, creativity, and confidence.
  Gygax and crew didn't make modules at first because they assumed that anyone running the game was not just capable of creating their own adventures, but that they would far prefer their own stuff. The same folks hesitated to publish settings because they assumed anyone who wanted to build a campaign world could and if they did so it would not just be good enough, they would prefer it.
 
  I bought OA when it came out. I never saw a module in anyone's hands. Heck, I didn't remember there had been modules until a few weeks ago. And the only time I saw Kara-Tur was on the shelf of a buddy who is a completist. By the Fall of '85 when I was at DLI I know of at least 3 OA games there: one set in Japan, one in Korea (with all new monsters and a mix of OA and PHB classes), and the third in a fun Thai/Philippines/China setting, also full of unique creatures, spells, and a class or two.
  I also really enjoyed meeting a magic-user in 1986 that was PHB with martial arts as his only weapon. He was from Lyonesse, but was orphaned and raised in a monastery for a decade until an uncle retrieved him and taught him magic. Tons of fun.

  Here's the bottom line. Jeffro has every right to be upset about anything he wants to be upset about. And it can be really hard to 'get' that OA was not meant to replace anything ever, just be stuff to add to your game and, with effort, make a more Asian Asialand. But I had never encountered the same pains Jeffro did with this book.

  Thanks for the original work, Jeffro!

NPCs for Fun and Adventuring: The Crew of the Black Parrot

I have had these guys floating around (pun intended) in my campaigns since at least 1981 and in my Blackstone campaign they became favorite NPCs with the party giving them a 1/4th share of treaure from any adventure the crew took them to/from.
The ship was originally called the Drunk Parrot but after seeing the amazingly bad film Knights back in the '90's I changed it to the Black Parrot.

[Knights is a Z movie by Albert Pyun where Kris Kristofferson and Lance Henricksen play cyborgs, Here is the trailer

You're welcome.]

The Crew:
Captain and owner Jo'Gahn- Raised in a small fishing village he signed on with a merchanter at the age of 13 and worked his way up to captain. By saving his money and investing it he made enough to buy his own ship.He is a shrewd man, an excellent judge of character, and a great leader. He will take passengers, especially adventurers, for a fee but he won't take just anyone; if approached he will check with his network of contacts which includes merchants, priests, and town officials and will not take evil people or those with a reputation of not paying their debts
Jo'Gahn is a 3rd level Man-at-Arms (from Far Realms; if you don't have it, treat him as a 2nd level fighter than can't advance in level). H.P. 12 A.C. 8/7 short sword, +2 Cloak of Protection (added to armor class). In an emergency he will grab a buckler. Neutral Good.
  Jo'Gahn is in his mid-30's, has black hair, a beard, and is balding. He is deeply tanned and strong from a lifetime at sea. He dresses well to maintain his image as captain.
First Mate Altair- Altair has been friends with, and working for, Jo'Gahn for 15+ years. Altair doesn't have the flair for business that Jo'Gahn has, but he is just as good at leading men and sailing ships.
Altair is a 2nd level fighter who cannot advance in level. H.P. 11, A.C. 10/9 He typically fights with a club and is skilled enough with them he has a +1 to hit. In an emergency he will grab a buckler.
Altair has sandy hair, brown eyes, and tanned skin. He is a little taller than average and carried some extra weight around his middle. Neutral Good.
Second Mate Smeagol- Smeagol has been with the ship since death of the original second mate in a tangle with pirates 4 years ago. he is liked and trusted by the crew and his superiors. He is a skilled navigator and sailing master but has no interest in the business side of merchant ships. The men tend to come to him first with personal problems (but Altair first for problems with the ship!).
If sailors need to go ashore in dangerous areas (for water or food on a desert island, say) Smeagol leads the group.
  Smeagol is a 4th level Scoundrel (another Far Realms class - treat him as a second level thief with only the listed skills without it). H.P. 10 A.C. 9/6 He fights with a club. He has a +1 Ring of Protection (a gift from an adventurer who chuckled about his name).  The ring and his dexterity are listed in his A.C.
He has the following abilities-
Move Silently: 27% Hide in Shadows: 25% Pick Pockets: 30% Climb Walls: 68%. If he can backstab a foe he does an extra 4 points of damage.
Smeagol has brown hair and eyes and is in excellent shape. He is handsome and charming with a quick smile.
The Men- The crew is made up of 12 more men who work as general sailors. All are 0 level with 2-4 H.P., A.C. 10, armed with clubs.
They are very loyal to their captain and officers. Any attempt to subvert them, encourage mutiny, etc. will result in them passing a message to the nearest officer and warning the rest of the crew.
The Ship- The Black Parrot is a well-built, well-maintained two-masted cog. It has extra cabins allowing it to carry up to 8 passengers (double occupancy) and up to 5 more can bunk in hammocks with the crew.

Interlude: Music

The party approaches the ancient castle.

They creep inside, nervous at being unopposed.

Then they hear - this

Yeah - you'd run, too.

Magic Item of the Week: The Sword of Sharp (Plus - My Own Chart for Swords of Sharpness)

  After a discussion of metaphysics, Platonic Ideals, and Plato's Cave with my oldest son
  [don't judge us]
  he came up with the Sword of Sharp.

  The Sword of Sharp: This weapon is a simple, unadorned longsword. It is immune to acid, rust (including magical effects), fire, electricity, and cold. It also makes all item saving throws at +4. It is +1 to hit only.
  In many ways the Sword of Sharp behaves as a Sword of Sharpness; on a natural 19 or 20 attack roll that results in a hit consult the following chart'

Roll (d12)   Effect 
 1 – 3           The blow is particularly deep; +2 damage
 4 – 5           The cut 'shaves off' a part of the target; +4 damage
 6 – 7           The blow severs the target's off hand (1-4) or trailing foot (5-6), +2 damage
 8 – 9           The blow severs the target's primary hand (1-4) or lead foot (5-6), +4 damage
 10               The blow severs an entire arm or leg (roll randomly), +6 damage
 11               The attack cuts off both legs (1-3) or both arms (4), +8 damage
 12               The target is decapitated, cut in twain, etc., target dead (unless undead, etc.)

  Although similar to a Sword of Sharpness the Sword of Sharp is 'more closely aligned' with the metaphysical concept of 'being sharp'. When drawn from its scabbard all foes of the wielder within 10' take a point of damage from the sharpness of the weapon. In melee every foe of the wielder within 10' takes a point of damage per round from being so close to the edge of the blade.
  If the wielder has the sword in hand and is performing a full parry there is a 20% chance that any spell, spell-like effect, or other magical attack targeted on the wielder will fail as it is 'cut apart' by the blade. Also, if the sword is swung around another person (as if cutting away items jutting from the person) for a full round there is a 20% chance that any enchantments or charms affecting the target are 'cut away'.

  Only one Sword of Sharp is known to exist.

Play Report: Our First 5e Game

  One of "my" presents for Christmas was all three 5e core books. I say "my" because my sons read them first and they are, really, a family gift.
  My oldest son volunteered to run a series of games and sons 2 through 4 joined me in making characters. The only restrictions? No sorcerers or warlocks.

The Players and Characters
  Me: Alton the Unlucky, halfling rogue with the charlatan background. Rapier, daggers, shortbow. Leather armor.
  A huckster and charlatan, Alton gave himself the nickname 'unlucky' and complains often about how much money he loses at cards. Of course, he wins often, he just uses sleight of hand to pocket his winnings to make it look like he loses his roll each time. He has a 20 Dex and put his expertise into investigation and thieves' tools.

  Son #2: Finquisst the Scared, half-elf mage with urchin background. Quarterstaff.
  Raised in an elven setting where he was shunned for his mixed blood, Finquisst is a skillful mage, decent scholar, and an emotional wreck. He has a thin, querulous voice, a timid manner, and a tendency to apologize for everything. He doesn't like his nickname but answers to it so as not to offend anyone.

  Son #3: Morgan Freedwarf, dwarf fighter with the hermit background. Great axe, longbow. Scale mail.
  The son of a famous military leader and a scholar Morgan spent many years alone in a remote holt obsessively studying the lore, legends, and history of the Axe of the Dwarvish Lords. One of his corespondents in lore was the sage who convinced him to leave his retreat for this mission. Morgan has a deep, rich voice that calms listeners. He also has a 19 strength and enough bloodlust for any three normal dwarves.

  Son #4: Larry, human ranger with the peasant hero background. Long sword, short bow. Leather armor.
  A very happy, cheerful man, Larry loves nature, animals, cities, farmers, merchants, kittens, and sing alongs. He is very hopeful, encouraging, and is a good and decent friend. All that being said, he hates evil, humanoids, scoundrels, and anyone who would hurt nature, farmers, merchants, cities, etc.
 

Set-up and Play
   The group was brought together by a local sage who hired us to recover the notes of a long-vanished scholar who 'missing' hermitage he had finally located after years of research. We were promised either 50 g.p. reward/fee (plus whatever we looted that was NOT a particular set of research notes) or (in the case of Morgan) notes on the Axe of the Dwarvish Lords. We were given a map to the suspected location (Alton promptly copied it that very night). We purchased mounts and left early the next day.

  After several days or relatively uneventful travel, the last few of which were beyond the borders of civilization (where the ruins of past empires were sometimes seen) we came to the location. It resembled a wide, low hill and passers-by would never give it a second look. But with the map pointing the way we soon found the door in the side of the hill and the small chimney jutting from the hill nearby.
  The door itself looked untouched for long decades, although the puzzle lock was intact. And smoke was coming from the chimney!
  I was unable to bypass the puzzle lock and determined that each failed effort to solve it would trigger some trap. Rather than risk that the ranger scouted the perimeter of the hill. Inside a dense copse the ranger found two small (4.5'-5') tunnels going into the hill but he also heard a loud buzzing. He fled toward the party. Seeing him running in the open we prepared for trouble.
  The 2 giants wasps chasing him were a bit of trouble; one stung Larry, reducing him to half hits, but we dealt with them soon. After checking the entire perimeter and confirming the two tunnels were the only other ways in we marched into the rightmost burrow.
  After 30 or so feet we heard a raucous celebration from ahead. I crept forward and found a large chamber, about 20' by 30', with 5 tunnels leading from it, including the one we were in and what was obviously the other burrow. In the middle were 4 large kobolds (well, large for kobolds) playing a game for coppers. There were females and young staring on. The kobolds were all cheering and groaning as the game was played. It was very lively and loud.

  Our opening salvo of arrows and fire bolt stunned the unsuspecting kobolds. It also killed 2 of them, grievously wounded one, and set a bundle of sleeping furs on fire (Finquisst missed). As Larry and Morgan charged the large kobolds I drew my rapier to protect Finquisst as he cast more spells. Larry and Morgan were mowing down the warriors, several of the young fled down the interior tunnels, and 2 females hustled to grab slings. Two of the young grabbed daggers and advanced to help fight Larry and Morgan.
  Larry and Morgan kept slaughtering their foes, Finquisst missed again, and one of the females hit Finquisst with a sling bullet. I charged the two females, killing them in 2 rounds, as Larry and Morgan mopped up the other combatants.
  We heard a commotion from one of the tunnels so we prepared a defensive formation near the exit tunnel and waited. before too long two giant weasels came rushing at use closely followed by the obvious chief and a female dressed rather oddly. I was in the rear firing arrows into weasels as they charged; Finquisst was with me using his cantrips. The weasels injured both Larry and Morgan; Morgan used his Second Wind to keep going. The female went down the first round, the other three by the third, mainly because of lucky rolls and me getting a backstab.

  After the battle was over, everything was quiet. The rest of the party stayed in the entrance chamber gathering loot and preparing for attack as I scouted.
  The first tunnel was in the direction the chief had come from. Before too long the tunnel pierced a rock wall and beyond was the bedroom of the scholar's home! The kobolds had been using it as the chief's room. Beyond it was what looked like a previous guest room that had been turned into giant weasel pens. There was also another room with a silver-inlaid pentagram on the floor, untouched, and another door which had been seriously barred from this side, obviously by the kobolds.  I looted what I could, avoiding the pentagram. Listening at the barred door I heard very faint scuttling sounds.
  The next tunnel led to what was obviously a sleeping area for the young and then breached another tunnel from the scholar's home. Again, the door to the rest of the hill was heavily barred. I killed to kobolds in the sleeping area.
  The last tunnel led to the scholar's pantry, then his kitchen, where I killed two more kobolds and captured a third. I also found another heavily barred door.

  Now that the entire complex up to the barred doors  had been scouted and cleared I returned and the party took a short rest. We then went to the kitchen, prepared ourselves, and Morgan kicked open the barred door.
  The 3 large giant spiders, each the size of a human, immediately charged us. After a tough fight we killed them, but Larry was knocked below 0 h.p. We stabilized him quickly and he soon made a save. I scouted the corridor and found that it had 3 more doors - two were obviously the other barred doors, the third was untouched for long ages. We retreated to the kitchen where Larry was soon at 1 h.p. We barred the doors, set watch, and took a long rest.

  Awaking refreshed we went to the third door and entered. Inside was an old, very old, alchemical lab. Most things had evaporated or decayed over time, but a few stoppered flasks were intact. I spotted something odd on a table and, creeped out by a pile of leather tubes on a table, shot it with my bow.
  The grick, which had seemingly once been pickled, attacked. Weakened by being preserved, we slew it quickly. One door from the lab led to a storeroom full of things like powdered iron and chalk dust. The other led to-
  A library! While the vastmahority of books had been destroyed by water, rot, time, and bookworms, the notes and such we had been sent for had survived on a table next to the body of the long-dead scholar. We collected it, as well as the 2-3 least-damaged books, and left for home.

Observations
  Me from playing a halfling rogue.
  - This is the first time I have ever willingly taken a party into an adventure without a cleric - and we were fine.
  - The fact that backstab works on enemies engaged with your allies is a big deal.
  - the ability of halflings to move through spaces occupied by larger creatures means halfling rogues have a lot more chances to backstab people in melee.

  My kids in the order they spoke to me.
  - From Son #3: it is more fun to play than to read.
  - From Son #4: it was enjoyable.
  - From Son #2: Good, but not as fun as 2e.
  - From Son #1: Solid and the rules meet their goals. Also, in [his] opinion the Basic Rules don't fairly reflect the full rules. In particular, the basic rules made it look a lot easier on the players than it is.

  We had a good time and will keep playing through 5th level to test things out.

  Everyone made 2nd level, BTW.

Magic Item: The Most Marvelous Armillary of Sassendal the Insightful

  This item and its concept was created by my oldest son, J.

  The sage Sassendal was rightly famous for his in-depth knowledge of the celestial bodies and their motions. His insights into their secrets earned him fame and wealth including a great gift from an adventurer - several pots of pigments that, when used to paint an image, made a duplicate of that thing depicted.
  Sassendal had used his wealth to finance the construction of a new armillary, one that he hoped would be not just the most comprehensive but the most accurate. The master craftsmen had completed the globe of Yrth (Sassendal's home world) as well as the bands for the sun, the moons, and the various planets. The sage gave the pigments to the master limner who had been hired to paint the surface of these globes and bands with the coasts, mountains, and rivers of the entire world or the various colors and patterns associated with them all.
  When the limner completed the Yrth globe he was astonished to see a brief flash as it was covered in movement: a film of clouds was visible over the miniature world!
  Equally surprised, Sassendal observed as the limner likewise used the magical paint on the bands of the sun, the planets, and the moons. As each was completed it seemed to flash into movement across its surface. When the last band, that of the sun, was complete it burst into light, glowing as if it were a miniature sun! The The various bands leapt into place around the mounted Yrth globe and began rotating in a perfect simulation of the celestial motion.

  Further, the Yrth globe accurately shows the weather of the entire planet (if it is a bit small).
  Sassendal was able to use the armillary for even more accurate work with the celestial objects and could further warn of typhoons and other great storms, earning him even greater wealth and fame.

  Since Sassendal's death the armillary rests in the Royal Library.

  The Most Marvelous Armillary: This magic item gives the following benefits:
  1) +5/+25% on all skill checks related to stars, moons, the sun, etc., including any sage knowledge checks.
  2) All divinations cast within 10' of the armillary have their duration and range increased by 50%.
  3) Further, all divinations cast within 10' have their accuracy increased by +3/15%,
  4) Anyone observing the armillary for 5 or more minutes can predict the weather for the next 48 hours with 80% accuracy.This check may only be made once a day per person.
  5) The armillary sheds true sunlight in a 60' radius.
  6) by using the various levers at the base a person can adjust the armillary to see the past or future locations of celestial objects allowing the very accurate predictions of solar eclipses, lunar eclipses, etc. The armillary returns to showing the present 1 minutes after such examinations.

  The armillary is 7' tall and weights 1,000 lbs. It makes all saving throws as hard metal at +3.

  Plot Ideas:
  -A Diviner has caught a glimpse of a future catastrophe and wants access tot he armillary to confirm his accuracy, but the royal librarian demands the hide of an ice fox in return for access.
  -Somehow someone has stolen the massive armillary from the king's library! The reward for its return is rather large....
  -The Royal Astronomer summons the party to the library. Advancing the controls to show 2 weeks into the future the armillary suddenly a falling star appears from the wall of the library and moves to the miniature Yrth, striking near the very kingdom you are in! The party has 15 days to think of a way to stop a falling star!

Magic Item of the Week: The Great Gauntlet

 These very rare magical items are of unknown origin and the secrets of their creation remain very well hidden. Each Great Gauntlet is a well-made armored glove of excellent craftsmanship and the finest materials. They are always discovered alone, never in pairs.
  A Great Gauntlet will magically resize itself to (properly) fit any human, demi-human, or humanoid of small or medium size. It will also magically reconfigure itself to fit whichever hand (right or left) that it is placed upon.
  When worn a Great Gauntlet allows its wearer to wield a weapon that normally requires two hands in one hand with no penalty or negative effect. For example, a human using a shield and bastard sword who was also wearing a Great Gauntlet would cause damage with the sword as if it were used two handed. Likewise a dwarven cleric with a great gauntlet could use a maul one handed without penalty.
  Using a large weapon with two hands while wearing a Great Gauntlet has no positive or negative effects.
  If a single creature attempts to wear two Great Gauntlets at the same time they interfere with each other; both Gauntlets vanish as they teleport to a random location and the wearer's arms go numb, acting as if they had been withered until the affected creature receives a Restoration.
  Great Gauntlets may only be used by fighters, and fighter sub-classes, clerics (but not druids), and assassins.

The Spooky Castle

  In my Blackstone campaign (AD&D 2e S&P) the main party is name level and have built a large fortress/cathedral on the border controlling a pass in the mountains/hills. The fortress is made from the local stone (black granite) and sits on a bluff voer looking a river. The name of the massive black fortress that looms over the countryside?
  Skullfang.
  The Lord of the fortress?
  Doomsman the Destroyer.
  Of course, Doomsman is Neutral Good and there is a cathedral within the fortress for a Lawful Good cleric.

  The kids love the idea that every now and then a party of good-aligned NPC adventurers ride into the village and have to be reassured that the local villagers are quite happy, thank you kindly, and need no rescue.

Play Report - The Dungeon of the Really Crazy Wizard-Type Guy

  A rarity for DStP: a play report from me!
  For his birthday my 3rd son, S., asked to start his own campaign.
  Woot! A new campaign where I get to play! S. is very imaginative, very creative, and runs a good game, so a campaign will rock.
  The system?
  HackMaster 4th.
  Woot!
  So characters were created by me and the other three 'Older Brothers' and we played this week.

  The Party
  Me - Grandolph Greywand. Human magic-user. The only child of two wizards who were each celebrity magic-user/adventurers, He was raised in wealth, sent to the finest schools, and graduated top of his class from the most elite magic academy in the land. He is highly intelligent, highly educated, rich, charming, suave, well dressed - and a complete jackass. The only thing larger than his ego is his sense of entitlement.
  Lawful Evil.
  Has a porter ('carrying things is for the poor') and a personal valet (his first valet recently retired after 20 years of service. Grandolph is 21).
  Began with a ton of excess honor.
  Joined the party because he is certain that any adventuring party will get him fame to exceed that of his parents because he is in it!

  N. - Gary, son of Gary of the house of Gary. Human-ish fighter. The son of a pfalszgraf of a realm in the Forest of Forever, his parents were murdered by his evil uncle, Bob the wizard. Bob had Gary sent to an orphanage run by zealots of the Torture God. As a result of the rather rigorous training of the orphanage Gary is phenomenally strong, incredibly tough, and absolutely unhinged. In addition to being an alcoholic (he turned to the bottle for solace at age 6) he is also a glutton. He firmly believes that rightful heir of the entire world.
  Terribly maladjusted, he often confuses people with his words such as,
  "Innkeeper! Dinner was delicious, but where are the branding irons? I am ready for dessert."
  or
  "A day like today makes me grateful for the monks who used to beat me with sticks for breathing too often."
  Neutral Evil. 16 years old.
  Uses a two-hander. Liberally.
  Began honorable (somehow).
  Leader of the party and dedicated to claiming his rightful inheritance (see above).

  J. - Lewis von Lübeck. Human zealot of the god of Competition and Games. Led a particularly average life (small town, two nice parents, 1.4 siblings, etc.) until the last week of seminary when his master had a divine vision that he was destined to serve Gary, son of Gary of the house of Gary. Ever obedient, Lewis complied.
  Now having served Gary for 4 weeks Lewis suffers from the 'Little Faith' flaw.
 Lawful Neutral.
  A skilled pugilist, Lewis enjoys a good round of fisticuffs.
  Began honorable.
  His god told him to join the party.

  A. - Willie. Dwarven fighter/thief. His parents were life-long petty criminals. When Willie was 12 they were unjustly executed for the (only) crime they didn't commit. He was taken in by a dwarf who explained he was a master thief and would train Willie to get his revenge.
  Unfortunately, his mentor was actually a crazy, drunk beggar who messed up Willie's development as a thief.
  The only things Willie has of his parents is their seabed-hugging social status and a 500 g.p. debt to the mob.
  Neutral Evil.
  Uses daggers and his fists.
  Began dishonorable.
  He is so desperate to pay off the mob he would join any party. he is so incompetent no sane party would have him.

  The First Session - Part I
  Grandolph met Gary, Lewis, and Willie at the Tavern of Contrived Meetings and soon decided they would follow a set of rumors to the Dungeon of the Really Crazy Wizard-Type Guy. The party, surprisingly flush, set out on horseback (with Grandolph's hirelings walking) towards the lost dungeon. As the party drew close they were ambushed by a large troop of baboons.
  Grandolph immediately cast a Fireball, Sidewinder Factor I towards the largest collection of the simian ruffians, causing a number of them to flee and igniting the tinderbox-dry forest.
  Gary immediately charged a group of them, raving about 'baboon night at the orphanage' and how he hoped he could remember all the cooking fire stories for the 'after-rending cookout'. Willie was soon attacked by a small knot of baboons and Lewis closed with the baboon leader.
  Gary was slicing his was through baboons like a hot knife through monkeys, Willie was struggling a bit, and Grandolph was ordering his hirelings to guard his flanks. Lewis met the chief baboon and squared off in a boxer's stance - to have the baboon chief do the same! In moments the two were engaged in a ferocious display of the sweet science.
  The fighting continued as the forest began to turn into an inferno; Gary was mowing through baboons, Willie was doing a bit better, Lewis and the baboon chief were exchanging jabs and Grandolph was exhorting his porter to stop whining as the baboons chewed on him. In a few moments only a handful of the baboons were left; Willie felled the last of his foes with a well-placed groin punch followed by a coup de grace; Gary was giggling about something to himself as he wiped his two hander, and Lewis was still trading blows with the baboon leader.
  Finally, bored and wishing his tea Grandolph rode up and cracked open the baboon leader's skull with his quarterstaff and the party rode on. Grandolph apologized for disrupting Lewis' duel, docked his porter 3 days of pay for being unable to carry things, and waited for his valet to finish tea.

  More soon!

Intelligence, Items, and the Impact in your Game World

  No, I am NOT done talking about intelligent weapons! While this does seem to be the topic that I can't stop writing about, we are almost done, I swear!
  To sum up - according the the AD&D DMG intelligent swords are much more common than I thought (and based on comments, much more common than anyone seems to play), most of them are Good, and a lot of them talk. There seem to be good reasons for fighters to use intelligent weapons and equally good reasons for magic-users to not use intelligent items. And, the topic of today's discussion -
  Virtually anything can have an enchanted intelligence.

  The DMG specifically mentions archways, door, buckets, pools of water, fire, illusions, and more.
  When I was discussing this with my sons they alternated between stunned amazement and cackling with glee. Both reactions were about the sheer gobsmacking possibilities. Their initial ideas (in the order they gave them to me):
  My oldest: "What if there is an earthquake and a magical pool drains into a river that is also diverted? A village could be flooded by an intelligent river that likes its new home!"
  My fourth: "What if the fire that threatens the mill is a Lawful Good fire forced to burn buildings to survive? It can Heal people once a month but needs timber from a family's home to survive."
  My second: "Imagine this - a man comes to the party asking them to break the curse that plagues him. The party learns that he is an intelligent illusion that thinks he's a real man."
  My third: "The entrance to the cathedral is an intelligent archway that can Know Alignment on all who pass through and will tell people that they need to Atone."
  And my first blush: "A wizard's tower with an intelligent door that can speak, knows the password, and can cast Wall of Force - the door man is the door!"

  In many of these cases the intelligent item will not have routine contact with a creator or wielder that could lead to a personality conflict, making these sorts of items much less dangerous for clerics and (especially) magic-users to make and use. Because of the costs we also can assume that the vast majority of these items would be made by demi-humans and clerics with the fraction made by magic-users both very small (probably 10% of the total at the very most) and the most powerful.

  I will let you and your imagination think of more amazing things you could do with autonomous intelligent items with magical powers!

  But this means that my discussion of types of intelligence in magical items might need to grow. The fifth category will need to be "true intelligence created solely by magic". This would be much more than a types of 'expert program of magic' that uses if, then statements to mimic intelligence, but a much closer approximation of actual intelligence with some autonomy and free will, and even its own knowledge unique to itself.
  This is at least implied by the spell Unseen Servant and its 'cousins'. An unseen servant is explicitly not a creature of any sort, but is a 'force'. This force can obey orders, such as 'open that drawer' but also can do things like clean and mend even if the caster doesn't know how to mend. And other spells point to similar autonomous skills and at least some level of reason - if we expand our attention to spells that are not in the core 1e books but were in modules and such we see things similar to an unseen servant that can cook, mend, make camps, hide tracks, etc.
  It isn't hard to imagine a powerful mage creating a new intelligence whole cloth for a powerful item, is it?

  But let's also think about what a world like a fantasy RPG is like from a new angle for just a few moments.

  In science fiction one of the most popular themes is First Contact, the initial encounter of Mankind with other sentient creatures. Many of these stories are classic books, movies, or TV; The War of the Worlds, First Men in the Moon, A Message from Space, Contact, A for Andromeda, E.T., His Master's Voice, Close Encounters of the Third Kind, and a lot more.

  One consistent theme is - how would we understand a different sentient being? How much of how we think and communicate has to do with what we are physically and how much is as abstract as the idea of consciousness?
 
  Many fantasy worlds have a lot of intelligent creatures in them that aren't human. AD&D is like that - there are a lot of intelligent non-humans.
  A lot.
  Many.
  A rather shockingly large amount, actually.

  And sure, we can argue that while elves, dwarves, orc, goblins, halflings, gnomes, goblins, kobolds, hobgoblins, hill giants, ogres, etc., etc. are, well, just 'humans that look funny' as far as the nature of their intelligence is concerned, we have some much more extreme examples.
  Mind flayers are lovecraftian horrors that communicate via telepathy and prey upon intelligent creatures; beholders make mind flayers look like a favorite cousin! We also have ropers, neo-otyughs, aboleth, boggart, etc., who are very inhuman in everything from appearance to senses to lifespan to diet.
  If you ponder 'how different must elves be from humans since elves live so very long?' try pondering how much different a dragon must be, or a foo lion, or a xorn, or a slithering tracker!

  Stanislaw Lem, perhaps the most widely-read science fiction writer fo the 20th Century, is justly famed for his book Solaris. Of course, one of the central themes of Solaris, and a number of Lem's other works, is the impossibility of two radically different types of creatures communicating even when both are highly intelligent.
  We can assume that the majority of intelligent humanoids in an RPG are close enough to communicate at least a fair amount (and I wonder if the grouping of 'demi-human' versus 'humanoid' is as much about communications and sympatico types of sentience as about alignment). But we also know, directly, that there are intelligences that fit into Lem's category. Cloakers are said to be so "other" that while demonstrably intelligent no intelligent communication is possible with them.
  So we know that 'totally alien intelligences beyond the possibility of communication' exist and are 'canonical'.

  Think of the possibilities in world building alone! What if the Elf-Dwarf conflict is innate to their comprehension of reality because of their modality of sentience? As mentioned, what if orcs, goblins, etc. are innately evil not due to a curse but because of the very nature of their intelligence - the fact of their sentience makes them hate creatures not like themselves? Imagine nations facing each other across an ocean where not only is communication between the nations very difficult because they have radically different emotions but also the aquatic race in the ocean between can't communicate with either nation at all?

  So let's get back to intelligent items. We know that residual magic can cause gret changes in the environment so that inanimate objects resemble living creatures and have at least a rudimentary intelligence (mud men, remember?). And we also know that intelligent objects are possible and varied.

  Imagine this - a wizard has a compound on the shore of a small lake. He has boats which are enchanted to move on their own; the stones of the quay were quarried by magical servants; The nearby arch was enchanted to sense the intentions of those who passed through it; friendly nixie live in the small lake; decades of residue of alchemy wash into the water. Then, tragedy! There is an attack and the mage and his servants all die with the powerful (but unintelligent) magical sword of his gurad captain falling into the water.
  Over the decades the compound falls into ruins: the boats rot away, the magical wood drifting into the lake bed; the arch collapses, its enchanted stones being worn away by the water alongside the magically-quarried stones; the magical sword corrodes into rust that mixes with the ashes of burned spellbooks that washed into the lake as they settle upon the corpses of the long-dead nixies who perished in the fight.
 A willow which first sprouted long years after the fight grows upon the shore of this small lake, its roots knotted along the bank and its withies dipping into the water. It takes many years but the willow begins to 'awaken', to sense its surroundings, and to think. It takes more long decades, but eventually the willow is, on its own, intelligent.

  Can it communicate? Could humans or dwarves understand it? Can it speak? Listen?

  And more importantly in the overall picture, imagine a world where this can happen, the impact this would have on life! Do foresters talk to trees before they cut them down not out of quaint folkways but rather because the tree might actually answer them? Could that brooch passed from mother to daughter for generations as part of bridal gifts actually tell you about the family's history? Might that cart horse actually be, yes, smarter that the teamster - and the teamster is pretty smart?!

  As above, I leave the rest to you. But the next time you roll for random treasure...

...don't forget to check to see if it is intelligent.
 

 

Far Realms is Almost Done - Time for a Give Away!

  Far Realms is hard to quantify in terms of 'time to write'; it is mainly a collection of house rules from my 36+ year old AD&D 1e campaign turned into an OSRIC/OSR-friendly format. So on the one hand I could claim the book took 38 years to write (time from my first written house rule until now). On the other, I started the conversion about 18 months. It has been a great family project with the wife and 4 older sons enjoying the process as I took a little time most Saturdays to turn this into something other people can enjoy.
  And that is, in the end, what I hope for - that other people enjoy the book.

the back cover in black and white galley proof

It has alternate weapon specialization rules, additional abilities for thieves, assassins, druids, clerics, magic-users, and illusionists. I have an alternate initiative system, rules for upkeep and maintenance, and an OSR ruleset for disease and parasites.

  I have expanded a hireling or two and added the healer and merchant hirelings. I have 4 NPC-only classes (the Man-at-Arms, the Religious Brother, the Hedge Mage, and the Scoundrel), and I have 4 new PC classes (Barbarian, Bard, Nobleman, and Scout).

  There are rules for followers for barbarians and noblemen and expanded charts for fighter followers.

  Oh, and 33 pages of new spells.

The front cover in black and white galley proof

  We hope to have the final version up on RPGNow this weekend!

  

  Of course, we are going to give away a free copy - just leave a comment on this post (or on google+) promising to write a 5-star review and we'll add your name to the list (OK, you only have to promise to actually read it). On Sunday morning my 11 year old will pull one of the names from a hat and we will get the free copy to the winner!

Experience Points - Yeah, I am going there

  The release of 5e has also released the discussion of experience points, leveling, classes, etc. You know, the only things we talk about more than alignment.
  BTW, the nine alignment system is great.
  But the discussion is seemingly focused on experience points. More specifically that in 5e you go through low levels fast. My published comment on this on my first read-through was,

  "You either FLY through low levels or crawl through higher levels"

  And it seems I wasn't alone.
  I think one of the interesting arguments about the level progression is that the designers of 5e wanted to give players time to make it to high level. Yeah, I'll bet that people getting to high levels is much more common with these rules! I suspect that designers and such as well as a lot of bloggers think most people don't get past about 10th level because of time constraints.
  Of course, I disagree. I think the fact is most people prefer to play low- to mid- level PCs and those that don't can just hand out experience and play Forgotten Realms-style.

  But also lurking about out there is the age-old 'hey, I kinda' get experience points for killing foes, but why do we get experience points for money and magic items, anyway? What about X.P. for skills, and being clever, and those sorts of things?'
  The answer is - plenty of game do! Rolemaster springs to mind as a system where all sorts of things associated with skills can earn you experience points. Since you can take the various elements of Rolemaster (Arms Law, Spell Law, etc.) and 'plug them into' AD&D why don't you just do that?
  [Note: then you'll be playing Rolemaster, not AD&D]

  Let's spend a minute talking about alternate experience points systems or, more precisely, one alternate system in particular and how it affected campaign and play.
 
  For a number of years I have used an alternate experience point system for my AD&D 2e S&P campaign that is based upon one used by Lew Pulsipher. The mechanics of it are, well, Byzantine;
  First, determine the average level of the party. Multi-class and dual-class characters add 1/2 the value of their secondary classes (.5 rounds down) together.
      Example: The party consists of: Jerczy (7th level fighter), Annirara (6th/5th fighter/magic-user), Urisone (8th level thief), Brother Reynaud (7th level cleric), Lorlimar (7th level magic-user), and Omac the Ready (5th/5th/6th fighter/magic-user/thief). The average level of the party is [(7+8+8+7+7+10)/6=7.8, round to 8] 8th level (Annirara counts as 7th level and Omac counts as 10th).
  Then you determine which individual class present in the party requires the most experience points to advance from the party's average level to the next level.
      Example: In this case the classes in the party are cleric, fighter, magic-user, and thief. The party's average level is 8th meaning the amount of experience needed is;
  Cleric: 30,000 XP
  Fighter:125,000 XP
  Magic-user: 45,000 XP
  Thief: 50,000 XP
  The fighter requires the most experience to advance from 8th to 9th level so the 'XP Target' is 125,000.
  Now we get to the really fun part! I determined that advancing from one level to the next should take the square of the average level of the party with a minimum of 4 adventures and a maximum of 50. Why? we will get to that later! So in this case;
      Example: The party has an average level of 8, the square of which is 64. This means that it should take the average party of 8th level an average of 64 adventures to progress to 9th level. I call this number the 'Base Progress Number'.
  Now that we have that we simply divide the XP Target by the Base Progress Number
    (125,000/64)
  This gives us what I call the 'Base XP Award' - in this particular example, that number is 1,953.
  Then I determine my (admittedly subjective) evaluation of both the difficulty of the adventure and the performance of the team as a whole. The adventures are rated from Very Difficult ( I expect the party to need to retreat and recuperate at least twice to overcome this threat) to Very Easy (they might barely notice that it was a serious threat) and the group performance is rated from Excellent (innovative use of resources, great planning, top-notch roleplaying) to terrible (missed obvious clues, blundered into ambush after ambush, played out of character, etc.).
They both have a number rating:
  Adventure Difficulty    Group Performance
  Very Difficult: = 1.5       Excellent = 1.5
  Difficult = 1.2                Good = 1.2
  Average = 1                  Average = 1
  Easy = .8                       Bad = .8
  Very Easy = .5              Terrible = .5
  At the end of the adventure I multiply the Adventure Difficulty by the Group Performance to get the Award Modifier.

  [brief aside - yes, I really do all this after each adventure]

  Let's say the party faced a Difficult adventure (a large number of foes, for example) but they were clever and had a cool plan so they pulled it off without needing to regroup, doing Good. That is
  (1.2 x 1.2 = 1.44)
  So the Award Modifier is 1.44.
  Almost done!
  Now we take the Base XP Award and multiply it by the Award Modifier to get the XP Award;
  (1,953 x 1.44 = 2,812)
  So each character receives 2,812 XP for the adventure!

  Does that seem complicated to you? Let's just say I have very clear memories of spending 4 hours on a Sunday adding up each and every monster in the Glacial Rift of the Frost Giant Jarl that had been killed by the party , every copper of treasure they had hauled off, and all of the magic items pulled out or used and calculating the xp all by hand because my parents' calculator was broken. "Just doing some math" sounded like a great idea!

  But there was a serious problem. When my 2e party reached about 5th level the players were disgruntled - eventually this led to them confronting me over the paucity of treasure and (especially) magic items in the campaign. Sure, they all had great NPC contacts! yes, they had wonderful roleplaying opportunities! The magic items they did have were unique, interesting, and woven into the tapestry of the campaign, absolutely! But they still very few magic items and were on the edge of penury.The player of the mage told me he had wanted a henchman for 3 levels but couldn't afford one!

  This confrontation led me to realize that I had been neglecting to put what the players wanted into the campaign. Yes, the adventuring was fun; yes, the NPCs were fun; yes, the roleplaying was fun.
  But heroes get rewards! The players did not feel that they were getting to enjoy the spoils of success.

  But what does this mean? I mean, what are experience points really for and about? Yes, I know we like to talk about experience reflecting some sort of learning and development by the player characters. Sure. Fine. That concept is baked into the name we use (experience points) for the idea.
  But that is merely a justification.
  In my opinion experience points serve a three-fold purpose:
  One, they are a key element in motivating players to actually play
  Two, they are a key element in rewarding players who actually play
  Three, they are a key element in controlling the tone and pace of play.
  Let me explain what I mean.

  Motivating players: Yes, there are plenty of players who like to play RPGs for all sorts of reasons. But have you ever played a game you can't win? How about a game where nothing interesting happens? We tend not to play them too long, do we? Even in "pure" storytelling games imagine a game where NPCs never change or develop and the changes and development in your PCs have no effect on the campaign - not very satisfying. All RPGs have in them, somewhere, a reflection of the desire of the players to change, grow, and progress via their characters. Some players want to progress mainly through a character narrative, others through the accumulation of (in game) power or wealth, others through skill development, etc.
  But within the paradigm of D&D and related games the primary method of character advancement is via experience points. This is one of the reasons the three pillars of Gary's experience points are beating monsters, looting vaults, and getting magic items - these reflect defeating evil, getting rich, and acquiring cool stuff. While that certainly is every motive behind players, it sure does cover most of them! This also means that the primary method of motivating players is also through experience points.

  Rewarding Players: I started covering this, above. Since character advancement is the ultimate goal of RPGs getting to advance is the primary reward of RPGs. Now, for one player it might be gaining an artifact, for another establishing a stronghold, for a third overthrowing the demon overlord that enslaved his realm, in the end the mechanic within the game the reflects this in anything approaching a concrete way is experience points.

  Controlling Tone and Pace: As I have mentioned many times before, I believe the 'most fun' range of levels for AD&D 1e and 2e is 3rd to 7th; with the custom experience point system I detailed in excruciating detail above it will take a party an average of 8 adventures to get to 3rd level then 9 more just to get to 4th, 16 more to get to 5th, etc. All told it should take an average party doing average in average adventures 135 adventures to go from beginning at 3rd level to making 8th level. My 2e campaign met about 48 times a year so it took us about 3 years of heavy play to go from level 1 to level 8.
  This obviously reflects my desired pace! I am able to tightly control the pace of level advancement while literally not caring what the official XP value of any monster is other than to eyeball if it is too weak or too powerful for the party.
  The great thing, too, is let's say suddenly the group could only meet every other month, 6 times a year. Do I really want it to take us more than 23 years to get from 'wet behind the ears' to 'I can almost establish a stronghold'? Well, I could easily cut the Base Progress Number in half (or more) and radically speed up level advancement. By increasing the difficulty of adventures the party cold also get better modifiers, also accelerating advancement.

  But there was a serious problem with that experience point system as I ran it, wasn't there? In the end the cost of me radically changing the method of advancing meant that the players were not happy. AD&D is based upon certain assumptions and some of those are that a fair amount of money and magic items pour through the hands of player characters. The players had trouble getting their characters to 'fit' into those assumptions when I wasn't allowing for them.
  But another, more serious, problem was more hidden. It is that in the end character advancement was based solely upon my personal opinion of how fast they should advance. I determined the 'adventure difficulty'; I determined the performance level. If the party killed 20 more kobolds this time than last but I thought they weren't very clever about it? No change in experience points between the two adventures! The party killed 20 less kobolds the time after that but I thought the plan was really clever? No change in experience points between the three adventures!
  My players are clever; they knew, at lest unconsciously, that I was more in charge of their characters' advancement than they were.
  Remember how important character advancement is to players? Well, not having that advancement taken w\away from them is pretty important.

  The same players from my 2 e campaign are in my 1e campaign. In 1e I use the original XP methods from the DMG. The party is much happier with advancement in that system. They can't articulate why, but I know it is because the rewards are for defeating foes and accumulating wealth and for gaining wondrous items and because now experience point awards are impartial and consistent.

  Yes, it is very easy to modify experience point awards and system. It always has been! Just please, keep in mind the impact it is going to have on your game.

Spell of the Week - Jonas' Jab

  A long time ago, back about 1980, I rolled up a new character and got an obvious magic-user. His initial spells included Magic Missile and he was fun to play.
  But he blew the roll to learn Burning Hands. Now, for us Old School AD&D 1e types if you blow the chance to learn a spell you can never learn that spell, ever, unless some very specific or unusual things happen.
  At least I still had Magic Missile!
  Then I blew Shocking Grasp. And then Charm Person.And Sleep, for goodness' sake!
  Now, Jonas had a 17 intelligence, so this was flat-out cursed dice!
  Second level wasn't so bad, Sure, I blew Detect Evil, Audible Glamour, and Mirror Image but I had Web and Stinking Cloud.
  Then 3rd level spells came. Oh, did they ever.
  Jonas promptly blew the rolls for Fireball, Lightning Bolt, and Flame Arrow (I took Monster Summoning I as my 'free' spell).
  So there I was, 5th level and my go-to damage spell was still Magic Missile.
  So I invested the coin, took the trips into lost libraries and sages' towers, and - invented a bunch of variants of Magic Missile! By the time Jonas was 9th level he was called the Gatling Mage!

  The first variant was a second level spell called:

Jonas' Jab 
Arcane Evocation
Level: Magic user 2
Range: 10 ft/ caster level
Duration: Instantaneous
Area of Effect: One Creature or Object
Components: V,S
Casting Time: 1 segment
Saving Throw: None
  The magic user points at a target within range and releases a bolt of eldritch force that strikes unerringly causing 2 points of damage per level of the caster. The bolt hits with enough force to throw small objects away from the caster a distance of 1 foot per level (for a 1 lbs. object); larger and smaller objects have this distance adjusted based on weight. Non-magical objects struck must also make a saving throw vs. normal blow or be broken. If the object is held by a creature that creature must make a saving throw vs. paralysis or drop the item. Jonas' Jab is stopped by Shield and other items and spells that affect Magic Missile, such as Brooches of Shielding

  As you can see, this is a very minor change - it can hit things rather than just 'creatures' and it has a few mild aspects of the Push spell added. The set damage was nice, too.

Magic Item of the Week - The Spear of Pain

  This spear is of unknown origin, originally found deep beneath Mount Thunder in the hoard of an Ogre Mage assassin. The Spear of Pain has a shaft of a metal that resembles iron and is as strong as steel but weighs no more than a wooden shaft. The spear head is leaf-shaped with mildly serrated edges near the point - the head appears to be made of meteoric steel. The entire spear is non-magnetic, does not conduct electricity, and does not rust. It is also immune to acid, cold, fire, and cannot be Disintegrated. Overall the spear is 6' long and weighs about 4.5 lbs. and the shaft has faint runes or letters of unknown origin and meaning.
  The spear is +4 to hit and does 2-14 (d8+d6) points of damage on a successful strike. If the to hit roll is a natural 19 or natural 20 and the strike is successful the creature struck is wracked with agony; any creature affected by this intense pain has their movement rate reduced by half, is at -15% on all ability checks (tracking, Hide in Shadows, etc.) and is at -4 to hit. The pain lasts for 2-20 turns per infliction - the durations stack.
  The Spear of Pain is famous as the primary weapon of the Mysterious Amazon and was wielded by her at the Battle of 5,000 Zombies, the Siege of Skystone Castle, and at the Duel of Chax.

Seaward Campaign - Brigid's Adventure Log

Real time: July 5-6, 2014


Je. played Brigid, a human Barbarian
Ja. played Seamus, a human Druid
A. played Starkiller, a half elf Fighter/cleric/magic user
S. played Clarence, a half elf "fighter-thief"/assassin
N. played Akira, a human monk


Backstory:
I am Brigid, born of the sept O'Mara, clan Branaugh. I was born under a summer moon, some 18
years ago. My family has a proud history with our clan, one of the strongest on Isle Eiru. I have such
fond memories of roaming the hills and valleys of my beautiful homeland, first learning to spar and
fight by playing games with my ten siblings and countless cousins. And then the dark times came
when I was but 9 years old. A blight came upon the land, and our previously fertile hills were
practically barren for too many years. It hit our family's homestead particularly hard, and the wicked
pains of hunger are never far from my memory. My body grew taller and taller as I approached
adulthood, with only the strength born of my happy childhood sustaining me during these lean years.
When I reached the age of full womanhood, my world fell apart even further. A rival clansmen
attempted to dishonor me, and quite frankly, I beat him to the pulp he deserved. Upon discovery of his
injuries, his father, head of clan Donegal, approached my family and offered a terrible choice - I may
marry his son, the rotting lecherous bastard, and save his clan's honor, or he would be forced to declare
conflict with our clan. Weakened by the famine, I could not see my family succeeding against this
challenge, and neither could my poor father. So, I left. Banishment would save my family and also
keep me from wedding the vile son. I am tall and strong, I knew I could make my own way. I will
work hard, further hone my fighting skills, and earn enough gold to restore my family to glory. My
need for revenge upon the forces of evil that brought famine upon our land, and upon the dreadful clan
Donegal, drive me. My faith teaches me that revenge is for God alone, but sometimes I can't resist the
rage I feel deep down inside...


I found passage on a ship bound south for a city called Seaward. I worked the sails for my passage.
The crew seemed somewhat frightened of me after I put down the first man who tried to dishonor me,
but they couldn't deny my hard work and assistance with fighting off pirates, so they left me alone for
the rest of our journey. Once in Seaward, I found work in the city as a sign painter (my fascination
with art as a child actually was valuable, though my cousins swore I was wasting my time). It wasn't
long though before the ugliness and stench of the city got the best of me, and I set out for the
countryside. I hear that the Dwarvenlands might remind me of home, which I miss so very much. I
made my way through various small villages, offering my services at the small taverns and inns,
reprinting signs and drawing portraits in exchange for my food and board. I eventually came to the
town of Old Bridge and found plentiful work, and I knew I needed to rest there for awhile. I am
fearfully lonely.


At the inn where I was staying, I met an interesting fellow who goes by the name of Starkiller. A half
elf, he has been kind to me, and has told me of adventures he has had with a few friends, fighting evil
and coming to the defense of weaker villagers. This appeals to me, I am running out of places to draw
new signs, and I am thus far only making my own way, not acquiring gold and treasure to help my
family. I am, quite frankly, pestering him daily, asking to join him and his friends on their next
adventure. I wonder if I should warn them of the rages that come upon me at times, but I don't want
to scare them off, I must prove how helpful I can be, first. I guess the time for me to prove that is
now, as he has finally come to tell me of a new request for help they have received. Something about a
legend of a town who fears the new moon, and people disappearing. I am intrigued.


Day 1:
I have met Starkiller's friends. One of them, Clarence, is overly fond of drink, and I am somewhat
suspicious of him. Seamus seems like a stand-up guy, and Akira is an interesting kind of fighter. They have told me more about the legend, and the new troubles in the village. Seems that 25 years ago or
so, near the village of Richacre, the local lord, named Sir Tremare, built a great guard tower, so he
could watch over the briars on the border. There was a large gargoyle on the top. About a year later,
he and his men all vanished from the tower. Interestingly enough, the gargoyle disappeared, too. After
that, every new moon, one to three people would go missing. The tales tell that the creature that took
them away was said to look like a gargoyle. Several times men said they had killed it, only to find that
the next morning, its body had disappeared, and at the next full moon, people would vanish again.
After about a year and a half, the attacks simply ended. Well, about two months ago, it seems like the
attacks started again. The village sent out word, asking for assistance. Supposedly another adventuring
party arrived to help, but then they disappeared, too. Seamus has heard of the village asking again for
help, and is organizing his friends to set out. I am joining them, and they were kind enough - maybe
mercenary enough? - to loan me money to buy a horse. I am wary of owing money to that Clarence
guy, but hopefully my gamble will pay off. I must show them my worth and try to keep the rage at bay.
Hopefully I can join them on many more adventures and save money for my family. But, first things
first, we are off to the village of Richacre. As we set out, it is cloudy, misting, and very, very hot. How
I miss the cool breezes of home!


Later that evening...
We passed the village of Ham on Wye around noon, then stopped in Stowanger to eat lunch at the
Tankard and Bowl tavern - a good bowl of stew and some beer, very refreshing. We are really on the
border here, you can practically see the edge of civilization. As we set out, we see a sign and are
headed toward Richacre. We arrived late that afternoon, to find a village heavily fortified, with ditches,
earthen ramparts, and palisades. We entered the open gates, and found twelve buildings inside,
including ten family homes. Towards the forest in back, there was a lovely grove of pecan and walnut
trees.


After we entered the gates, we spoke with Tardyl, the head of the village, and the gatekeeper. Both of
them indicated that the last group that came to help was very shifty, and they weren't all that surprised
that they had disappeared. We spoke with them both about the legends, and Tardyl insisted that
several people actually killed the gargoyle, but the body always disappeared! Now, more people are
vanishing. There is no pattern to the targets, and way back when it first started, people as far away as
Stowanger and Ham on Wye. Many people were scared away, and there are only about 50 people left in this village. They offer us a place to stay in a local house inside the walls, and we all note that there is a full moon in two nights, so we should have time to investigate.


And then, Seamus began talking with a crow! He tells us that the crow said that something that smells
funny flies in and out of the tower, there were humans living in the tower 3-4 weeks ago, and there was
a big monster, a Drake, that they rode around. There is also, apparently, something suspicious in the
forest, and something is calling all the crows south for the battles to come. There is definitely evil
afoot, and I can only hope to contribute to its banishment.


Day 2
We got a good nights sleep and awoke this morning to a dreary, misty day, with a fierce north wind, but
it is surprisingly hot. We approached the tower, and saw lots of tracks going between the tower and a
nearby hill. It is a rather foreboding tower, made of dark grey granite, certainly a guard tower and not
a home. There seems to be a place on the south east corner where the old gargoyle probably was at one
point.


My companions and I decided that we should check out the hill before approaching the tower, and
circled around to try to explore he hill without being seen by the tower. I noticed a strange thing, the
tops of the pine trees all around the hill are scorched, and behind the trees there is a cave. Akira
snuck into the cave and found a 24 foot long red dragon! It was chained to the wall, sitting on a pile of
copper and silver. Thankfully, Akira was unseen! Starkiller detected evil, and tells is it is massively
evil, plotting revenge, and very, very annoyed.

We decided to ignore the dragon for now, since he seems securely chained, and see what we have to
deal with in the tower.


Later that day...
We got to the tower safely, and Akira opened the grate in front of a door and saw two humans with
crossbows, grilling meat over a brazier. Akira knocked down the door and we attack! Inside, I remind
myself to not give in to the rage, and I successfully killed one of the bad guys, and my companions
killed the other. Once inside the tower, we opened a door to a spiral staircase, and decided to go down
first. We found a store room with a well and a secret door. The secret door opens onto a dusty, 40'
long hallway with a door at the end.


We decided to clear out the tower before exploring the evil we detect in the secret hall - best to know
what we are dealing with.


The cellar and the first floor remained as they were before we entered the secret tunnel. We climbed
the stairs to the second floor, and I opened the door just a crack and peeked in. I saw four men, and
rushed in (keep the rage at bay!) I killed a guy, and then another. Starkiller kills another, and
Clarence got the final blow against another. As we are searching the room, a man burst into the room
bearing a two handed sword. Clarence recognizes him as Merle, stupid but strong. How does Clarence
know these bad guys? I definitely don't trust him!


Seamus cast a fairy fire spell on Merle, he glowed with an outlined contrast, which should have made it
easier to hit him. Unfortunately, in the heat of battle, my inexperience shines through, to my shame.
I can't seem to hit anything, and I am no help at all to my companions. Maybe my inner fights against
my rage are distracting me? My companions are fierce fighters, however. Akira punched and stuns
him. Suddenly, a woman peeked in the doorway and touched Merle, healing him. Starkiller threw a
dart at the woman. Merle attacked Akira and knocked him unconscious, but Starkiller healed him and
kept him on his feet. Behind us, a thief type appeared in the window and started throwing daggers.
Meanwhile, Merle started being affected by the heating metal of his armor, thanks to a spell cast by
Seamus. Merle is eventually killed by the heated metal, and I got myself together and killed the
woman in the hallway. As we were healing each other and getting our bearings after the battle, we
noticed a guy fall outside the window, in an oddly slow, light way. I pulled out my longbow and shot
him dead as he tried to run away.


We cleared out the rest of the tower, which was empty. From the top of the tower we could see a long
way, we even saw smoke in the distance by where Skull Mountain must be. Clarence found a spell
book, a book on combat and tactics, and a book on the history of Seaward on a bookshelf.


We went outside the tower and raided the body of the man I killed running away, and got a ring and a
key. He was running toward the dragon, perhaps it is the key to his chains?


We went back inside to explore the hallway behind the secret door in the basement. We went through
the door at the end of the hallway and found a room. It was littered with old skeletons covering the
floor, and there were a couple fresher bodies, plus a pile of coins and a large shield. We noticed two
secret doors, and I opened one of them. I found the gargoyle! I rushed in to attack him, and once
again, I just totally failed. Oh, my dreams of fighting evil to avenge my family, how can I fail now??
The gargoyle attacked me and injured me, which shook me out of my inept stupor, and I finally killed
the gargoyle. We opened the other secret door and found a large room with a big seal on the floor and
glowing moss on the floors and walls. We could sense evil in the corner, and nearby, but decided that
we should rest and heal up before exploring further.


Day 3 We went back down to the large room behind the secret door to check out the lead-lined seal on the
floor in that one room. We detected brooding evil, and decided (wisely, I believe) not to open it. We
need to deal with dragon, and there was great debate over what to do. We decided to take our loot
(including the head of the gargoyle thing, to prove we have actually killed it) to the village before we
deal with the dragon. In the village, we contacted the local hedge wizard to identify our possibly
magical loot. We discovered that we have oil of etherealness, so we decided to use that to kill the
dragon. Clarence rubbed the oil will over himself and then we all got ready in case he needed our
help. Clarence entered the dragon's cave ethereally and when the oil wore off, he was able to surprise
the dragon, attacking the dragon with his sword and killing him with a well placed blow. We gathered
his rather paltry loot and carted it out with a mule train, including the dragon hide (we used the
magical sword we found and Akira's leather working skills to preserve it whole!)


My first adventure. I am ashamed of how often I missed my attacks, but I did kill several bad guys,
and managed to keep the rage at bay, so maybe my companions will try to keep me around?


(from the DM, Experience Points: 1600 - plus 500 extra for Clarence)


Treasure:
9000 cp. 20,000 sp. 3,000 GP


Potion of treasure finding
Oil of etherealness (used)
Scroll (illusion spell, phantom armor)
Potion of extra healing
Potion of invisibility
Potion of Orc control
Potion of heroism
+1 leather armor
+1 short sword
Ring of Feather Fall